Gay Club Jet Lag

Hello August. This year has been flying by. Is this some collective dream or just how time passes when you’re an adult? 

I’ll keep today’s blog short and sweet because I have more coming your way soon (threat). As always, here are my top tracks of last month:

Unsurprisingly, “Apple” takes her rightful spot at the top of July’s charts. Close behind is Nashe’s new single “Getting No Sleep” from Quantum Baby, which drops on the 16th.

Another release to look out for is Ravyn Lenae’s Sophomore album Bird’s Eye. I went to a sneak-preview listening party a month and a half ago and she’ll be sure to have you yelling “mother” once again. (Btw I made her laugh. So. I’m her favorite fan.)

Two early contenders for August’s Mother of the Month? Only time will tell.

This is the first time since April that “Nasty” hasn’t been in the top spot or the top ten. She’s still in the top 20 at 17, and there are a few “Nasty” remixes ahead of her, so fret not, it’s still a Nasty Girl Summer™️.

We also see two appearances by Mariah Carey, the first being the “Honey- Def Rascal Anthem” remix. It’s the perfect song for… everything. A morning run, the pre-game, in the shower, in the car… Mariah’s ad-libs in this track will inspire you to sing along and freestyle with her.

As for “Dreamlover,” that’s always felt like a quintessential summer song to me. Whilst moving, I wanted to tear my hair out and lie down in the street. But, when I entered the corner store to get a Soylent, the track miraculously started, as if Mariah were seeing my pain and whistling from afar- “It’s all going to be ok.” My bad mood instantly evaporated.

The last number I’ll discuss from this list is “Fuck the Pain Away” by Peaches, which is on here because it’s Liz Lemon’s ringtone.

Circling back to Mother of the Month, I can’t name a diva who mothered any harder than the rest this month, so I’ll give the prize to: the movers who brought all my books to my new apartment. It was a very heavy box.

AUGUST’S MOTHER OF THE MONTH: The Georgian movers who moved my books

Uh, shout to Kamala too ig.

Lastly, here are my quotes from the notes that didn’t make it into the blog- yet.

Don’t say “New York” and then give me an address in jersey. Be serious. Get a job

That’s that coconut tree espresso

There needs to be a social media where I am the only account and everyone gets notifs when I post but it’s not the same as my blog bc I basically just send tweets but I’m the only one allowed to post and everyone loves it

Mexicans should colonize the Italian neighborhoods of New York. All we need to do is slap the eagle on their flags

Ik you’re not the love of my life bc I just watched you do ketamine but still
I don’t care how k-ed out you are make a fucking move
(he did, btw. and then he offered me K. I turned him down.)

“You want the good news or the bad news first?” You are not charming.

As a little treat, I decided to film a Vogue-style 73 Questions video. I don’t have enough money to survive a lawsuit if I call it that though, so this video is brought to you by “Voog*.” I’ll see you guys very soon. Enjoy 🙂

Lol so part of the beauty of this blog experience is that I’m learning so much, including that uploading videos to YouTube takes forever and I should have uploaded it the night before jajajaja. So be on the lookout for an update with the link to the video when it’s done ❤ enjoy this thumbnail in the meantime… Also I guess I should have been promoting that there’d be a change in form so maybe this is a blessing in disguise? Premiere at midnight ig – this post has since been updated. Watch the video below.